I Tell Stories
I Tell Stories Podcast covers a wide range of topics discussed by Colt Draine and Owen "The Mic" McMichael. From the scourge on humanity of violent business hippies and Scott Baio to peculiar Serbian Mother's Day traditions,the boys offer their unique perspective. Revolutionary artists,legends of folklore and bizzare following of fast food items are just a few of the subjects touched on. I Tell Stories aims to bring attention to individuals and occerrences that are too interesting to be forgotten. Two long time friends who keep each other laughing give listeners their take on the world. Everyone has a story, these are ours and those of many others.
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I Tell Stories
Vampires: Zosia
Ever wondered what happens when the past refuses to stay buried? Join us for a spine-tingling journey as we unravel the mystery of Zosia, a 350-year-old alleged vampire found in Poland. With a sickle around her neck and a padlock on her toe, her burial details read like the script of a horror movie—but was it more than just superstition? We explore the cultural fears that might have sparked such a dramatic entombment, delve into her possible Scandinavian roots, and ponder if her dental quirks or mental state played a role in her chilling fate. Plus, thanks to modern technology, you’ll get to "meet" Zosia face-to-face as we reveal her reconstructed appearance in a way that blends the eerie with the educational.
But that's not all the spooky surprises we have in store! Shift into a lighter gear with us as we explore the world of vampire bats, those winged creatures from the Americas that can surprisingly sprint across land. A fun fact for your Halloween trivia arsenal, these bats add an extra layer of mystique to the season. Don't forget to catch videos of these little runners, guaranteed to leave you both entertained and a bit unsettled. As we wrap up, we send our best wishes for a Halloween filled with love, laughter, and just the right amount of fright.
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Uh, hoi, hoi, hey bro, happy Halloween. I hope that wasn't the wrong kind of creepy voice. Uh, man, uh, we're here at ITS. Uh, we're just letting podcasts land. You know, real fast, sometimes we do shit on the fly, guys, and it doesn't mean we're pretty fly for white guys, like we talked about in another episode about the 90s, but uh, nonetheless it is the spooky season. My friend and I want to start this episode out with saying happy birthday to my kids. Nevaeh, her birthday is Halloween. So, happy birthday, nevaeh, we're recording on Halloween. Happy birthday Nevaeh, yeah, and're recording on Halloween. Happy birthday Nevaeh, yeah. And happy birthday Adam, the spooky man himself. We have to say that every Halloween man we're saying so.
Speaker 2:Happy birthday, adam. All right, I wonder what Adam thinks of. You know, the Dodgers just won the World Series, and so there's the obligatory lighting things on fire and looting in Los Angeles to celebrate a sporting event going a city's way.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, yeah, yeah, let's destroy the city In the city. I wonder what Randy Newman would think about that. We love LA, sorry.
Speaker 2:Anyway, yeah, there's, like nary, a mention of looting and touching ballad by Mr Newman who hates short people.
Speaker 1:I know Nicole does not agree. Slytherin, I know, I know Slytherin, slytherin, anyhow, anyhow. So here we are, found this pretty cool story, guys. Well, I don't know, take it as you wish, but it's spooky, I feel nonetheless. And it's about an apparent vampire named Zosia, and there was a couple different pronunciations of this. The closest I got that I feel would have been right was the Polish-style one, I guess. So it's Zosia or something like that. So just bear with us guys. Anyway. So apparently this woman or well, barely woman, she was only about 18, lived about 350 years ago. They discovered her corpse in Poland and she was buried with a sickle around her head it's like over her neck, like into the earth, right, owen?
Speaker 2:Yeah, and a padlock on her toe, yeah, pretty distinct. It was presumed she was a vampire and found in a field of vampires with around 100 skeletons, I think, but apparently she must have been the most feared, correct, there are others that have restraints and stuff like that, but it was that if she were to try and rise after death she'd be decapitated, right? They thought she was probably rather well-to-do. She was found with a silk cap and there was speculation that she might have been Scandinavian and at the time apparently the Swedes and the Poles were not seeing eye to eye. I don't know what the beef was, but there's a lot of wars going on.
Speaker 1:Polish beef. Oh my goodness. Yeah, that's pretty ill Poland. Yeah, the thing about the toe padlock thing I tried to look more into it a bit and basically what it comes down to is it represents more like that she's not going to be able to return. So it must have had some magic to it. I'm assuming, like if she was to get up and survive being beheaded by this sickle over her neck, then the padlock on her toe must have had some magic. That just represented hey, you're not coming back, right. So I don't know.
Speaker 2:Other skeletons were found weighed down with stones, and a lot of them had coins in their mouths. Hmm, so I didn't get to look into, since we're doing this kind of quickly. I didn't get to look into the significance of that, but again, probably some type of magic or some symbolism. For sure they weren't just like stuffing coins in vampiric alleged vampiric corpses' mouths. Bad economics.
Speaker 1:It was a different time, okay, different time, nonetheless, pretty scary shit. Hey, you know, the thing about the coins that I just thought is is maybe it's very similar to putting them on your eyes, because when I read this, too, and most of my information came from the new york post and uh the sun, okay, just to give them some reference of where we're getting all this from. But when people would put the coins on eyes, you know, to get the other side of the bridge. But it could have been a similar thing, right, just a different culture. And also, when I read this too, she was by far the most feared and it was very clear that that was the case.
Speaker 1:I don't know how they determined this, but I did watch a video real quick on like how they remade her 3D model. So if watch a video real quick on like how they remade her 3d model, so if you do look up this and within this, this is why the story popped up is is that they actually recreated her face and it's amazing, like they did a sculpture and everything. So if you just look up zosia the vampire, hopefully it comes up and you're able to see the images for the story. Um, the the other thing is that she was by far the most feared. So, although these other people may have had like tendencies of vampirism or whatever, they were fearing their family members probably still had hope that they were going to get to the other side, you know. So to me it feels like nobody wanted this woman to return, and I don't know how. But they also said that they believe she may have had severe mental illness.
Speaker 2:And they said that she had a deformity like a protruding tooth. That also probably led to the speculation that she was a vampire. And also people with silk caps are often very frightening, so that's a phobia. It's quite common.
Speaker 1:I think, yeah, silk cap phobias are real. I don't know what that's called, but it's a thing, guys. Hey, you know, I listened to some stuff on vampires recently and you were saying that tooth and it's kind of up in the air on whether vampires and this is like people who teach college courses on this there is such a thing, no-transcript, where the vampire punctures the neck and then sucks the blood out in those ways. Or are these teeth used to puncture the neck and then they kind of just suck on the neck, like you know, weird kids trying to give each other hickeys. You know what I'm saying? Like it's unclear. So those are the things I took from it, beyond the fact that you know what a scary time to live in, you know what a scary time to live in throughout the last, like you know, 1700. So the last like 7, 8 thousand years of Europe has been nothing but like war, war, and we're talking like people on battlefield, don't forget disease.
Speaker 1:That was fun too sorry yeah, no, for real, bro, I'm just yeah, disease. Like there's just so many things that are going on. Happy Halloween, this is the best episode ever, so yeah, but there's so much trauma that has been passed down over time and these people are just scared right Like they don't know what's going on, Like this is back in the day where, even in this period of time, there's very obviously a lot of magical thinking going on. You know, the church and whoever they could see an eclipse and determine that it meant whatever was going on. For this reason and maybe they thought this woman was causing it, I don't know I'm also wondering if they killed her. It doesn't state that. I don't feel. Did you see anything on? If, like, she had any injuries for her death? It didn't really give me a cause, I suppose, and I was kind of interested in if it was a Frankenstein situation.
Speaker 2:So but I didn't see. Yeah, exactly, but I was. Yeah, I was hoping for her sake that she was didn't just like lay there starving to death or something. I don't. I don't know.
Speaker 1:Right, and you think, man, mental health though? Yeah, we, we've made some leaps and bounds, people, you know, we don't kill mentally ill people and call them vampires anymore, so that's a good thing.
Speaker 2:Well, I think there are many children too, too, and some like decapitated. I mean, you have to be pretty scared of something to think like a child's a vampire and cut their head off.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's a real thing. Yeah, among the other remains found at the burial site like you were kind of touching on there, bro, were a pregnant woman and a woman who had long suffered from syphilis so these are facts and a man with a child buried at his feet. So a lot of different, like variations of things, and it's just amazing, like how different we are. This really meant something to these people and it's easy to make fun of. But I just keep back, I'll backpedal on it sort of, but not, and then just say, like these people had to be terrified. You know what I mean. Like, yeah, that's the truth of it.
Speaker 1:And I don't know, man, I do enjoy talking about vampires on halloween and talking about things of that nature. So it's not out of our wheelhouse. The burial is just probably the most fascinating thing about it. And then you know, pien I don't know how to say this, but it's in Poland, pien, pien, I think I feel is where they found it, and such discoveries led to the area being called the Field of Vampires. So you're spot on there, my friend. This is a very massive vampire burial site that I did not know existed until I looked at my news feed, you know on my phone. And here we are today at I Tell Stories, talking about vampires.
Speaker 2:I did just watch the remake of Stephen King's Salem's Lot Ooh, which I will say was like the. I mean, I can't stand when stuff relies on CGI Right, but it was really cool how they did the vampire scenes and, like many Stephen King adaptations that had very little to do with the Right, that actual book. I mean, you can't really capture the soul of a of a book. Uh, it's like, if you do so, it's a, it's a masterpiece, but I still found it enjoyable. I saw the critics just trashed it, of course. Um, it was entertaining and I do. Yeah, that's probably one of the more interesting, other than just the, like Michael Myers, psychopath vampires are more interesting.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, halloween yeah, it's kind of right. It's kind of weird how they went from like terrifying to sexy, because that's what they push him as right. Totally understandable. But that's another point that was made in this thing. I was listening to trying to gear up for some knowledge on stuff for the show and it was basically he was talking about how you know, at first it was just like they were just these undead, you know, and undead people aren't very appealing.
Speaker 1:So over time is the yeah correct? So they started, like you know, making these people wealthy and whatever things, and a lot of it they believe came from when they would write these stories. It was kind of like turning the nobility like into evils, like they were. People hated the nobility. Okay, they wanted to talk shit on rich people, that's all there is. But then over time, you know, it became more of a social thing where you know people thought they were vampires. That's a real deal. They still people, still I don't know what the fuck. Why would you drink blood, man? That's like it makes you sick. Like there's got to be some side effect to these people who feel like they're vampires these days, drinking blood, I guess.
Speaker 2:Yeah, somebody probably should have had a pet as a child. If they're drinking blood, yeah, or maybe they shouldn't. What am I saying? Yeah, something to make them take a different path in life.
Speaker 1:Yeah A hobby A hobby, a couple hugs. Hey um A puzzle. Yeah, from Cold Smoke Tobacco Boogie's Bodega, located on First Avenue.
Speaker 1:North of Duke. Yeah for sure. Shameless plug, of course. That's what we're all about. Nonetheless, guys, this is going to be kind of a quick episode. Last fun fact that wanted to enter, just toss out there. I found out too that vampire bats are, uh, they can run on land really fast, which has to be terrifying, can you imagine. All right. So, guys, I haven't done it yet, but look up a video of a vampire bat running on land. Apparently that's a thing and, uh, they are native to south america, they're in the Americas people, for our American folks. So be careful out there on this Halloween night. Was that good enough to end it on? I don't know what do you got to say, owen? I don't think that should be the end. Should we catch them? With much love everybody and hope they stay safe out there.
Speaker 2:Much love everybody. Happy Halloween.
