I Tell Stories
I Tell Stories Podcast covers a wide range of topics discussed by Colt Draine and Owen "The Mic" McMichael. From the scourge on humanity of violent business hippies and Scott Baio to peculiar Serbian Mother's Day traditions,the boys offer their unique perspective. Revolutionary artists,legends of folklore and bizzare following of fast food items are just a few of the subjects touched on. I Tell Stories aims to bring attention to individuals and occerrences that are too interesting to be forgotten. Two long time friends who keep each other laughing give listeners their take on the world. Everyone has a story, these are ours and those of many others.
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I Tell Stories
Anton Chekhov: The Lottery Ticket
The Lottery Ticket by Anton Chekhov. Ivan Dmitry, the middle-class man who lived with his family on an income of $1,200 a year and was very well satisfied with his lot, sat down on the sofa after supper and began reading the newspaper. I forgot to look at the newspaper today. His wife said to him as she cleared the table Look and see whether the list of drawings is there. Yes, it is said, Ivan Dmitri, but hasn't your ticket lapsed? No, I took the interest on Tuesday. What is the number? Series 9,499, number 26. All right, we will look.
Speaker 1:Ivan Dmitri had no faith in lottery luck and would not, as a rule, have consented to look at the list of winning numbers. But now, as he had nothing else to do and as the newspaper was before his eyes, he passed his finger downwards along the column of numbers and immediately, as though in mockery of his skepticism, no further from the second line from the top, his eye was caught by the figure 9,499. Unable to believe his eyes, he hurriedly dropped the paper on his knees without looking to see the number of the ticket and, just as though someone had given him a douche of cold water, he felt an agreeable chill in the pit of the stomach, tingling and terrible and sweet. Masha. 9,499, is there? He said in a hollow voice. His wife looked at his astonished and panic-stricken face and realized that he was not joking. 9,499? She asked, turning pale and dropping the folded tablecloth on the table. Yes, yes, it's really there. And the number of the ticket? Oh yes, there's the number of the ticket too. But stay Wait. No, I say Anyway, the number of our series is there. Anyway, you understand.
Speaker 1:Looking at his wife, Ivan Dmitri gave a broad, senseless smile, like a baby when a bright object has shown it, His wife smiled too. It was as pleasant to her as to him that he only mentioned the series and did not try to find out the number of the winning ticket. To torment and tantalize oneself with hopes of possible fortune is so sweet, so thrilling. It is our series, said Ivan Dmitri after a long silence. So there is a probability that we have won. It's only a probability, but there it is. Well, now look, Wait a little, we have plenty of time to be disappointed. It's on the second line from the top. So the prize is 75 000. That's not money, but power, capital. And in a minute I shall look at the list and they're 26.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I say, what if we really have one? The husband and wife began laughing and staring at one another in silence. The possibility of winning bewildered them. They could not have said, could not have dreamed what they both needed the $75,000 for what would they buy? Where would they go? They thought only of the figures $9,499 and $75,000, and pictured them in their imaginations, while somehow they could not think of the happiness itself, which was so possible.
Speaker 1:Ivan Dmitri, holding the paper in his hand, walked several times from corner to corner and only when he had recovered from the first impression, began dreaming a little. And if we have one, he said why? It will be a new life, it will be transformation. The ticket is yours. But if it were mine, I should first of all, of course, spend $25,000 on real property in the shape of an estate, $10,000 on immediate expenses, new furnishing, traveling, paying debts and so on. The other $40,000 I would put in the bank and get interest on it. Yes, an estate, that would be nice, said, said his wife, sitting down and dropping her hands in her lap somewhere in the tula oriole provinces. In the first place, we shouldn't need a summer villa, and besides it would always bring in an income.
Speaker 1:And pictures came crowding on his imagination, each more gracious and poetical than the last. And in all these pictures he saw himself well fed, serene, healthy, felt, warm, even hot. Here, after eating a summer soup, cold as ice, he lay on his back on the burning sand, Close to a stream or in the garden under a lime tree. It is hot. His little boy and girl are crawling about near him, Digging in the sand or catching ladybirds in the grass. He dozes sweetly, thinking of nothing and feeling all over that he need not go to the office today, tomorrow or the day after. Or, tired of lying still, he goes to the hay field or to the forest for mushrooms or watches the peasants catching fish with a net. When the sun sets, he takes a towel and soap and saunters to the bathing shed and in the water, near the opaque soapy circles, little fish flit and fro and green water weeds nod their heads. After bathing there, it's tea time with cream and milk rolls. In the evening, a walk or vent with the neighbors. Yes, it would be very nice to buy an estate, says his wife, also dreaming, and from her face it was evident that she was enchanted by her thoughts.
Speaker 1:Ivan Dimitri pictured to himself autumn, with its rains, its cold evenings and its St Martin summer. At that season he would have to take longer walks about the garden and beside the river so as to get thoroughly chilled and then drink a big glass of vodka and eat a salted mushroom or a soused cucumber and then drink another. The children would come running from the kitchen garden bringing a carrot and a radish smelling of fresh earth, and then he would lie stretched full length on the sofa and, in leisurely fashion, turn over the pages to some illustrated magazine or covering his face with it and unbuttoning his waistcoats, giving himself up to slumber. The St Martin's summer is followed by cloudy, gloomy weather, rains day and night. The bare trees weep, the wind is damp and cold. The dogs, the horses, the fowls, all are wet, depressed, downcast. There's nothing, nowhere to walk. One can't go out for days. One has to pace up and down the room, looking despondently at the gray window. It's dreary.
Speaker 1:Ivan Dmitri stopped and looked at his wife. I should go abroad, you know, Masha, he said, and he began thinking how nice it would be in late autumn to go abroad, somewhere to the south of France, to Italy, to India. I should certainly go abroad too, his wife said but look at the number of the ticket, Wait, wait. He walked about the room and went on thinking. It occurred to him what if his wife really did go abroad? It is pleasant to travel alone or in the society of light, careless women who live in the present and not such as think and talk all the journey about nothing but their children sigh and tremble with dismay over every farthing.
Speaker 1:Ivan Dmitri imagined his wife in the train, with a multitude of parcels, baskets and bags. She would be sighing over something, complaining that the train made her headache, that she had spent so much money At the station. She would continuously be having to run for boiling water, bread and butter. She wouldn't even have dinner ready. Jeez, she would begrudge me every farthing.
Speaker 1:He thought with a glance at his wife. The lottery ticket is hers, not mine. Besides, what is the use of her going abroad? What does she want there? She would shut herself up in the hotel and not let me out of her sight. I know, and for the first time in his life, his mind dwelt on the fact that his wife had grown elderly and plain and that she was saturated through and through with the smell of cooking While he was still young, fresh and healthy and might as well get married again.
Speaker 1:Of course, all of this silly nonsense, he thought. But why would she go abroad? What would she make of it? And yet she would go. Of course I can fancy. In reality, it is all one to her, Whether it is Naples or Clinton. She would only be in my way. I should be dependent upon her. I can fancy how, Like a regular woman, she will lock the money up as soon as she gets it. She will hide it from me, she will look after her relations and grudge me every farthing.
Speaker 1:Ivan Dmitri thought of her relations. All those wretched brothers and sisters and aunts and uncles would come crawling about as soon as they heard of the winning ticket, Would begin whining like beggars and fawning upon them with oily, hypocritical smiles. Wretched, detestable people. If they were given anything, they would ask for more, While if they were refused they would swear at them, slander them and wish them every kind of misfortune.
Speaker 1:Ivan Dmitri remembered his own relations, and their faces, at which he had looked impartially in the past, struck him now as repulsive and hateful. They are such reptiles, he thought. And his wife's face too, struck him as repulsive and hateful. They are such reptiles, he thought, and his wife's face too struck him as repulsive and hateful. Anger surged up in his heart against her and he thought malignantly she knows nothing about money and so she is stingy. If she wanted, she would give me a hundred roubles and put the rest away under lock and key. If she wanted, she would give me a hundred rubles and put the rest away under lock and key.
Speaker 1:And he looked at his wife, not with a smile now, but with hatred. She glanced at him too, and also with hatred and anger. She had her own daydreams, her own plans, her own reflections. She understood perfectly well what her husband's dreams were. She knew who would be the first to try and grab her winnings. It's very nice. Making daydreams at other people's expense is what her eyes expressed. No, don't you dare. Her husband understood her look. Hatred began stirring again in his breast and in order to annoy his wife, he glanced quickly Despite her at the fourth page on a newspaper and read it out triumphantly. To spy her at the fourth page on a newspaper and read it out triumphantly Series 9,499, Number 46, Not 26.
Speaker 1:Hatred and hope both disappeared at once, and it began immediately to seem to Ivan Dmitri and his wife that their rooms were dark and small and low-pitched, that the supper they had been eating was not doing them good but lying heavy on their stomachs, that the evenings were long and wearisome. What the devil's the meaning of it? Said Ivan Dmitri, beginning to be ill-humored. Wherever one steps, there are bits of paper under one's feet, crumbs, husks. The rooms are never swept. One is simply forced to go out. Damnation, take my soul entirely. I shall go hang myself on the first aspen tree. Ahoy, ahoy, Ahoy, hoy. Oh, hey, hey, hey. How's this pleasant day finding you? Well, it's probably freezing balls there in Montana, I'm guessing.
Speaker 2:It's not luau weather, shall we say.
Speaker 1:Right, you know something like Russia at this point in time, I'm assuming the tundra. Yeah, Nonetheless, what did you think of the lottery ticket man?
Speaker 2:That was interesting and that was the first question. I imagined, listening to it, that it was fiction and was glad to hear that it was yeah, but just that it seemed that when we discussed it after Ed listened that we took away the same thing. Look, they didn't have any problems until they imagined they had all this money coming, and then they turned on one another and just yeah, I mean.
Speaker 1:Right, within a matter of minutes, it seems, you know, like, if you were to like think about it as I read, the story you know reads about 10 minutes long or so, but like, at the end of the you know it's, it's probably describing a five minute little thing there. You know what I'm saying. And they imagined all that turned on each other. All of a sudden, his wife's elderly, like what the fuck? I didn't like that part. I was like what the hell? I didn't like that part, kind of.
Speaker 2:I was like what the hell is this? Yeah, I really didn't like. It was ugly at times. I enjoyed listening to it, but I guess even after they, it seemed that they decided on that and the state would be a positive thing. Yeah, that was the one thing. But I guess that was just his thinking right. It went through his thinking first and then hers.
Speaker 1:Yes, correct.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so maybe she wanted to buy Twinkies. I don't think they have them, I don't know. I hope for their sake there are no Twinkies available.
Speaker 1:No, there would not have been. It was 1892 is when it was written. Yeah, so that was um, and it's funny that you um, that you say that about how the story, if it was fiction or not. He has like a thing that he's famous for, apparently, and it's called the author, uh, chekhov, it's called Chekhov's gun, the Chekkhov's Gun Principle, and it's a dramatic principle which states that every element introduced into a story should be necessary and irrelevant elements should be removed. This principle emphasizes economy and purpose and storytelling. So he's really just focused like that. And then what he typically was writing about, always what they say. Anyway, I didn't do a too in-depth thing, I really just picked the story because we I tell stories man I figured I'd tell a story and we talk about it. That's, that's where this comes from, guys, um, but anyway, he focused on ordinary people and the nuances of their like, behaviors and subtleties and all these things, and I thought it was a pretty good job and it's very like they didn't even have the money and they turned on each other.
Speaker 1:You know, that's the thing. It was just the imagination of it all, like actually made them upset, and I think we as people do that shit to ourselves all the time in many other ways. Right, like, our fantasy is kind of like, you know, we set the bar so high and then all of a sudden, like it doesn't manifest and then your world comes crashing down. You know, and it could be for some people as small as like an order, like they get your order wrong at Starbucks, they didn't have the right foam in there or something you know, and it's the end of their fucking world. Owen.
Speaker 2:Oh, several people can turn any little thing into a disaster. Yeah, it's a thing you know, but we all do. I can dwell on stuff, sorry, no, yeah, but that's something I'm not going to throw a fit about. No, especially in order of Right.
Speaker 1:Well, you know, especially in order of.
Speaker 1:Right, yeah, I agree, no, it's a thing, and it's really just about like yeah, it just shows human nature right there, how like happy they sort of were. At least they were content with their life, and then, as soon as they thought they could reach for the stars, they did and you know, then they disappointed themselves all in the same little period of time. I like to keep a positive focus about things as well. Like when we were talking about it, I was like dude, if you won the lottery I wouldn't be all jealous of you. I'd be like hell, yeah, dog, good job. Way to make a smart choice. I don't know, but it would be happy for you. You know, I guess that's a thing I would never think to be. Like what would she do with the money, especially if you were married and stuff? But I don't know, I feel like that's a thing.
Speaker 1:Anyway, guy's Pretty Famous is a cool short story. I guess you can take what you want from it. People, owen told me what he just spilled his guts on, how he felt about it right now. But uh, yeah, he was a hell of a writer apparently. That's all I know. Didn't want to look into him too much. If you do want to check him out. Anton Chekhov is. You know, just type it in man and you're going to find it, and he has a lot of stories. Apparently, he was a playwright as well, and there are more famous stories than this one. The other one would be the Lady with the Dog, which I haven't read either of these, and the other is called the Bet. He pioneered a style that focused on character development over plot. The Bet he pioneered a style that focused on character development over plot. The two that I just referenced there are considered literary masterpieces. So, as I can't speak correctly, this guy can write really well.
Speaker 2:I was also thinking what was the 75,000 that they were to have collected right?
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, and's just set way back in russia.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's what I mean? Yeah, I was thinking 1892, like what is 75? Yeah, ruples, imagine it was still. Oh, yeah, it's still ruples. So, yeah, like what is that worth today? Um, hold on guys. Oh, okay, maybe, whatever it is, it's worth less than one's life a day. Hold on guys. Whatever it is, it's worth less than one's life. Holy shit, you can't enjoy money if you're not around anymore.
Speaker 1:What year was it again? I fucking forget, damn it. 1892,. I believe you said oh wow, god, you remember everything what happened. Yeah, I believe you said oh wow, god, you remember everything what happened. Yeah, I know right, I was just going to give you a compliment, but I'm going to leave it alone. No, I'm just joking. I was just going to say you're going to make some lady lucky one day, rowan, because that's one of the guy's biggest things that we always be forgetting, shit that we shouldn't be forgetting.
Speaker 2:I live next to a grey house.
Speaker 1:Right, I can't find anything definite.
Speaker 2:There's a lot of money.
Speaker 1:Yeah, sorry to fucking draw that out. Oh, hold on. In modern terms, 75,000 rupees from 1892 might be worth around 7.5 million to 10 million today.
Speaker 2:So this would the rubles correct, Not rupees.
Speaker 1:Oh, son of a Indian, yeah, son of a bitch.
Speaker 2:Or at least was. I'm not up on current Russian nor Indian currency, but maybe I should be.
Speaker 1:Or is it rubles, I don't know.
Speaker 2:Rubles is the Russian, I thought it was rupees. I think rupees is Indian. Rupees is Indian, I believe.
Speaker 1:Yes, yeah, I know, I'm just marveling at how great we are at this sometimes. What?
Speaker 2:I don't even have a screen in front of me, I'm just going from limited memory of Russian and Indian currency, which I'm very much trading or professional knowledge. Hard-hitting journalism people. I tell stories.
Speaker 1:Oh my God, I know that's hilarious. I think I got better at this. I don't know. We're going to find out, okay. So just so you're aware, as of 2023, which I'm sure this could have changed the Russian ruble is roughly the equivalent of a not Jesus, not even a little over a penny, guys. So like a ruble. Now is one point, I don't even know. It's .011 cents, okay, guys know it's 0.011 cents, okay, guys. Uh, so anyway, therefore, 75 or the, the rubles from back then would be worth 11.25 million rubles now. So it's still I don't know. Over there. It might be a lot of money though, guys, I don't know, that's still a lot of money, but it doesn't compare to our fucking billion dollar drawings. That's. That's something totally different. I don't even know what would you do with $500 million. I'd take the lump sum and pay the taxes. That's what I would do, guys.
Speaker 2:Yeah, definitely so. Reinvest, take care of the people. Like, realize, and I mean that's just silly, because I don't even play the lottery, that is hypothetical. But like, yeah, I would also prepare for cousins. I didn't even know I had coming out of the woodwork, right, yeah, oh, hey, remember Thanksgiving in 1992? No, no, I did not. No.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know. I would probably not tell anybody.
Speaker 2:That's the thing yeah, I would probably just invest half of it and then maybe buy property with a quarter of it and give a quarter away for sure and again, this is silly, this is easy for me to say that when there's all this money staring you in the face, but I really honestly believe that's what I would do would be like, okay, people need this more than me, but I've got to be secure and uh yeah, yeah, and if you continue to make money off it and such too, then you can do more.
Speaker 1:You know some more good things Like there's yeah, I agree with you, and it doesn't take Bill Gates' money to be that way, but if you did have that kind of security, then you could really impact some shit. I totally agree. You know there is the possibility that you may end up going on a polar bear hunting expedition too, though who knows? You know that's.
Speaker 2:Nah, I'm not shooting a polar bear, I'm just joking.
Speaker 1:That's what I'm saying. How disgusted you got about that shows that you wouldn't be that way. Sorry about that, because I was trying to make a joke, bro, like you'd switch him.
Speaker 2:It's like I don't know Smokers have it hard enough Shit. No, I know you need to go kill one.
Speaker 1:You are an empath. That's so funny. Oh man, that's good though. Alright, guys. Well, I hope you liked the short story. We might do more of these because, uh, that was kind of fun and, um, I don't know. The goal would be to bring back some like stuff they're not teaching anymore. I was shocked. I think I remember reading this in high school and and stuff like oh, wow, yeah, and uh, it might have been a night school that I did, though I can't remember, I don't know, but I know I'd read it before and when I'd seen it I recognized it and that's why I picked it out.
Speaker 1:I didn't totally remember it or nothing, and you know, the other goal with it would be is here and there, sticking like you know, a retold folklore that's written kind of like, similar to the Tales of the Little People, that book I had from 18, 19, 14, or whatever the fuck it was, you know. So, nonetheless, I hope everybody out there is having a good winter. I don't know.
Speaker 2:If that's possible, guys, winter's probably not too bad in Haiti, right as you discussed.
Speaker 1:Yes, sorry about that, I didn't think you know the warm breeze is. I don't know. Maybe it's some kind of weird storm season, though Maybe it's raining like a mother.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, it could be very unpleasant and getting like yeah, yeah, but it's not cold, Colonized and Ugh gosh, no fun. Poor Haitians man, not cold.
Speaker 1:No, I've, yes, very much. So, yeah, I'm with Killer Mike now. I feel for them. Haitian people, anyway, feel for all. Yeah, well, yeah, for sure, of course, no doubt, dude. Yeah, all right, guys, well, anyway, have a nice day evening, whatever it may be, don't forget about us at pitlocksupplycom. Get you an I Tell a Story shirt, or maybe feel generous and click the subscribe link. You know, make our show grow. Share the subscribe link. You know, make our uh, make our show grow. Share it, share. It would be good If you guys share it on social media. That'd be King. I mean, that's the, the engine that drives everything at this point. So would be appreciated, and we do appreciate you out there.
Speaker 2:Much love everybody, thank you.
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