I Tell Stories
I Tell Stories Podcast covers a wide range of topics discussed by Colt Draine and Owen "The Mic" McMichael. From the scourge on humanity of violent business hippies and Scott Baio to peculiar Serbian Mother's Day traditions,the boys offer their unique perspective. Revolutionary artists,legends of folklore and bizzare following of fast food items are just a few of the subjects touched on. I Tell Stories aims to bring attention to individuals and occerrences that are too interesting to be forgotten. Two long time friends who keep each other laughing give listeners their take on the world. Everyone has a story, these are ours and those of many others.
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I Tell Stories
Pirates: Jack Ward
Ahoy hoy.
Speaker 2:Arr matey, we made it. We finally made it, my friend, to a pirate episode. Ahoy, are you excited?
Speaker 1:Absolutely. Yeah, that's one of the first things we spoke about, colt's super into pirate history and that was going to be One of the first ones, and somehow we got on To violent business, hippies and censorship and so on. And so 90. Yeah, 98 to be one of the first ones, and somehow we got onto violent business, hippies and censorship and so on. And so 90, 98?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think this will be 98. Yeah, I know it's crazy. We have literally it's in our show description too that we'll probably talk about pirates. Basically, we've never done one, never done a pirate episode. So here we are. We're going to talk about Jack Ward, originally John Ward. I'm still kind of lost in when he started calling himself Jack or why, but that is what he's known as mainly is Jack Ward. Have you ever heard of him? Jack and Boats? Yeah, jack and Boats. There you go. Yeah, bitch, I'm on a boat. Have you ever heard of him before?
Speaker 1:as far as pirates go, I think vaguely something only because, as you reminded me, that he is alleged. Well, this is claiming that Jack Sparrow, pirates of the Caribbean isn't real, which I was, I mean. Next thing, you're going to tell me that Easter Bunny and Jesus aren't cold. Oh man, but no, I did remember that you know vaguely hearing of that, but Right, well, no, I really didn't know much about it and still don't. This is much more knowledgeable. But introduce me to this interesting fellow. Well, not personally. We didn't have Bill and Ted. Take us back, not yet, not yet. Don't count us out.
Speaker 2:We'll get a nice place eventually, yeah for sure. Nice place for soirees, right, and the reason why they called it, like why he's named after this guy, jack Ward, is because Jack Sparrow well, this guy, he was given a nickname by the day of Tunis Uthman Day. He called him Birdie, basically because John Ward had a bird tattoo on his arm, which is it was a swallow, I feel, but nonetheless, like because sailors at that era, every time you went 5,000 nautical miles you would get a swallow tattoo, like yeah, so he had one and it was kind of a rarity in Tunis, in the Ottoman Empire, like that. So he really thought it was pretty cool and he thought it was really cool like work of art. But he started calling him Birdie, but he would always reference it to his as Sparrow because he'd never really been out to sea or on the coast all the way, so he'd only seen a sparrow, he hadn't seen a swallow. So that's why it kind of got that way, from what I understand, to swallow. So that's why it kind of got that way, from what I understand.
Speaker 2:Also, you know, they should cut him in because man Disney's got a haul on that Pirates of the Caribbean. So as of like 23, I think, or late 20. Well it was. Anyway, we'll call it 23 because I didn't reference the article 100%. But they've grossed $4.5 billion worldwide off that Pirates of the Caribbean franchise. So I don't know Jack Ward's ancestors. You should be looking out and seeing what you can do about that good piece of that Pirates of the Caribbean money.
Speaker 1:And remember us and I tell stories when you get that check.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because we pointed it out, guys. We're the only ones who've ever talked about this. Just keep it. Probably, guys, right, we're the only ones who've ever talked about this. Just keep it. Um, no, well, so Ward was born in 1553 in Farversham, kent. So he's an English folk. Uh, it's a coastal market town in Southeast England. He, so it was pretty like when you live in these coastal towns back then you're like going to have something to do with like fishing or trade most likely is what you're gonna do and what you're gonna know. Um, so that's what he was. He was a fisherman for a while there until, uh, what I got out of it is, uh, he, he kind of got into legal piracy, private privateering, during queen's aunt, queen anne's, war Jeez, I'm stuttering, jeez. But so that's how he got his start doing things that were more like on the warfare side of stuff. I suppose he was a privateer from 5088 to 1603. And that's when King James took the throne.
Speaker 1:And he kind of made peace with Spain. You know and I did see a very interesting quote right after that, when he was upset, obviously, that it was no longer essentially sanctioned piracy, and an acquaintance of his, andrew Barker, recalled Ward voicing his displeasure with the band, as I quote where are the days that have been when we might sing swear?
Speaker 1:drink drab Ward voicing his displeasure with the band. As I quote when are the days that have been when we might sing swear, drink drab, which apparently means whore about and kill men as freely as your cake makers do flies, when the whole sea was our empire, where we rob at will?
Speaker 2:I thought that was a Sony record exec quote at first, but then I thought it was in fact attributed to Mr Ward yeah, basically what happened here is Spain had just took over, you know, mexico, down through Panama, all these things, and they owned this huge land mass and they were just a behemoth.
Speaker 2:So everybody was trying to get a piece of that cake. And then back then the English didn't have a navy, you know, they were barely a freaking kingdom kind of in a way. And so like comparative to these other powerhouses, and her Queen Anne, her way of like kind of getting around that was, she started putting out letters of marque for privateers, and what a letter of marque was was her signature saying that you can loot the Spanish and get away with it. You know we're at war, so no big deal. And she'd hire these people and give them guns and stuff or they'd have their own kind of deal too. So it was a very like free market free market like Navy pretty much, and they also had to kick back to the Crown, so it made her money at the same time.
Speaker 1:So that's what all this.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so it was a whole thing. I mean, it was like a way of life for people, and then Well, yeah, they were obviously skimming off the top.
Speaker 1:Who's going to cop up 4% To the royalty? They totally were.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, that's what happened. So, within this, though, he got press ganged into the Navy after this point that you're speaking on, where you know, the commissions went away, which is the you know, the privateerian license and all these things Anyway. But like he got press ganged gang, which means you were pretty much like coerced by either getting clubbed over the head and knocked out and dragged on a ship, or you were like got him, they probably got him so drunk and just like stumbled on the ship, and then he woke up and you're out at sea, and that's how you joined the navy back then, guys isn't it still?
Speaker 1:or pretty much I'm unfamiliar in such matters.
Speaker 2:They brainwash you somehow and say join the Navy. Yeah, so that's what happened to him. This obviously pissed him off and it's also suggested during this time he gained the nickname Sharky as well. That's what he was known as in the Navy and to this day, anybody with the last name Ward that's their nickname is Sharky. So that's something I found out throughout this, which is kind of neat.
Speaker 2:So, hmm, now, ward, when they were doing this whole Navy thing, they had stopped somewhere and he was pissed right. He's like I don't want to be in the frickin' Navy. And he basically says while these officers are pretending they're doing something and they think we're just down here eating, how about we go take a ship? Right? So they go take a ship. Ward and 30 of his shipmates stole a 25 ton vessel and then they sailed it to the Isle of White where Ward was elected captain. This is the earliest like recorded account of somebody being elected to captain on a ship like that, which is also why a lot of people say that pirates started democracy as well, because they always elected their leaders, I guess, and you could be impeached too.
Speaker 1:That didn't sound like it went very well.
Speaker 2:No, it didn't. Yeah, usually most of it didn't end very well in that nature. Yeah, so this is a pretty interesting fellow we're talking about. He went around after this point and he had what was you had the story where he went to capture that Catholic ship.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, and it was supposedly just loaded with loot and someone had tipped off the owner and everything had been put ashore. So there's just basically like they got the boat. But no, yeah, this, you know, I thought that I made one of the biggest scores ever, and then it's like the trunk's empty. Basically Right, cause it's supposed to be full of treasure.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and then it took off. So, yeah, somebody got tipped off and they they're like, well, shit might as well make it a pirate ship, Right?
Speaker 1:And off they went. I think that was off island of Sicily, if I'm not mistaken.
Speaker 2:I feel you're right.
Speaker 1:Near and dear to my heart.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I know there is a lot. Jack Ward was a pretty big enemy of the Venetians back then. So when Ward and his men sailed to the Mediterranean, they were able to get a pretty big Dutch boat with 32 guns on it, which is pretty badass. I want a boat with 32 guns, wouldn't that be an interesting thing? Take it to Lake Elmo, yeah.
Speaker 1:Instead of people on their little paddle boats Right.
Speaker 2:Exactly. So. You know they're filling themselves out there, but they need kind of a port of call. You know there's no Port Royal Jamaica really or any of these areas where they can stop and fence or loot and do all this sort of thing. And they tried to stop in the Moroccan Port of Salé In 1605, though little did he know that English and Dutch sailors, including Richard Bishop and Anthony Johnson, they ended up fucking these guys over, so they weren't too hot on them. They got turned away In 1606, they're on their little pillaging spree, which sounds very piratical to me and they ended up finding themselves in Tunis where initially they still kind of had a bad look and they weren't too sure if they wanted to let them in the port.
Speaker 2:And all this even though Tunis at the time was a pretty big like capital for piracy over there from like the janissaries, which that's a whole thing in itself, but they're basically like ottoman muslim um soldiers, but very privileged.
Speaker 2:But they're and they were also usually slaves, which is kind of a whole concept. That's hard to wrap your mind around if you don't, if you don't know or don't have time to explain it, but the city's pretty like rugged and stuff. And what ended up happening in the end is Ward gave the day like a bunch of treasure, like, hey, I'm a pirate, I'm not like some English spy, I'm not whatever. Look at all my loot you know here, you can have it as long as you. Let us like go out there and attack people you know. And so he's like, oh well, fuck, yeah, let's do that. And they end up becoming pretty good friends at this point, and this is also the guy that gave him the name Birdie or whatnot. But then that that's kind of when he started his whole piratical career of just running amok out there, man.
Speaker 1:He said, rather late in life is when he started to be successful. Right, he just sort of, well, yeah, kind of a journeyman, journeyman privateer, like minor league, and then just stepped this shit up yeah, I wouldn't think a pirate. The lifespan of a pirate is typically, you know, the expected life expectancy back then of one in general probably wasn't great with disease and lack of medicine. But didn't he say he really got going when he was like 50?
Speaker 2:Yeah, he was about 50 or 50. I mean, he was born in 1553, and we're already into 1606 here, people Right, yeah so, but that's, you know, that's kind of when this whole area was just. I mean, there's still pirates in these areas, dude. This whole area was just. I mean, there's still pirates in these areas, dude. This is like where when you see on the news and you see the Muslim pirates that are taking ships, it's like out here too you know what I'm saying Like over in some of this stuff.
Speaker 1:So it's a the prices of stuff. You're going to see shopping cart pirates everywhere, sorry.
Speaker 2:Oh, maybe. So I mean, yeah, on the way out the door robbing people, that is a thing. I remember that was happening. Have a flag on their shopping cart? Yeah, a false flag, and I'm from Canada. I don't know what the hell is going on in the world anymore. Guys, no, guy, yeah, so you know.
Speaker 2:Nonetheless, this is all kind of crazy, but at the end of the day, this, at the end of the day, this day, he really trusted John Ward. Not day day, yeah, not no, friday day day. Ok, was there ever a day day? I don't think. So we should look up. Oh, and for the record, people, a day is kind of like the governor of, a mayor of a city which, like back in these times there wasn't really states, there'd be like city-states, you know. So it's like a town that's its own governmental entity. Basically, Right, did I say that? Right, I feel I might have, nonetheless. So Tunis is like kind of a city-state in the day. Uthman of that city and Jack Ward got along pretty good. He ended up putting him up in his treasury house, which was like a palatial mansion, said to be in. Like an alabaster mansion is what they call it in a lot of stuff.
Speaker 1:Marble, too right Stuff that you would not see in his at least not at the time in his homeland of.
Speaker 2:England, no, kent, yes, none of these things. Yeah, there's no mansions like that. You know the Middle East and in all these areas like it the odd man. They were ahead of the curve. You know, like even at this time you would have to look into it, but their slave classes weren't like really slaves, like they were more like government employees. It's a very weird thing, but nonetheless they were very much more so progressive than the rest of the world. They harbored a lot of fugitives of other countries, meaning like usually religious exiles and such stuff like that. They were very open to all these things and they were really big into reading and learning and all this stuff where the rest of the world was. Usually they were trying to use religion to control the masses as opposed to educate them and it seemed to be that the Muslim world at this time was kind of more on that tip of education and stuff. But I'm not saying they were perfect guys.
Speaker 2:I don't know how the women feel about that, yeah but well, they didn't hold those same beliefs, dude, I know, yeah, I know it, but I'm just saying these people back then they weren't on this extremist crap like they are now. You know, some of these guys Not all Muslims are like that people. It's a very peaceful religion, by the way, but nonetheless they got along pretty well and they started, you know, raiding English ships and Venetian ships and it was said at one time that for like a year straight, all correspondence from Venice and England which was a common thing, because Venice was like king of trade back then, you know, they were a global superpower, this city-state, and they basically everything had to do with him. Every correspondent said something about Jack Ward doing this, jack Ward doing that and over time, this guy using the Janissary Corps in Tunis, there he created like an armada of pirates, which is kind of cool. So he was out there really fucking shit up guys.
Speaker 2:This Jack Ward AKA Birdie, aka Sharky, you know, inspiration of Jack Sparrow. Well, I mean, come on, like he took some Maybe.
Speaker 1:We can't confirm if that is so or not. If so, again hey, his descendants deserve a cut of that Sharknado lune. So do Coolio's, by the way, God rest.
Speaker 2:Yeah, indeed, right, I bet you they do get something. Maybe I don't know. You know I'd be in a Sharknado movie. Why not Just putting it out there? If any movie liked that, they're like hey, you want to play a part in this movie? I'm like sure, guys, Whatever, Give me some money. Alright, I'm cool, Right?
Speaker 1:I don't know, I think their budget was saltines, maybe so.
Speaker 2:Maybe so I don't know, but nonetheless, this guy he ended up being an admiral of basically the Tunis Navy is kind of what it turned out to be, but on the other end of the stick he was looked at as a pirate, you know. So it's just how these sorts of things works, and we all know he really was a freaking pirate this guy was. This guy was pretty crazy stuff. He ended up converting to Islam at some point and then changed his name to yusuf and since he was an admiral of the fleet, he also, uh, was adopted the name raiz, and so he went sometimes by yusuf raiz, which I've read a lot of things where they're not even sure if he actually converted, because it's not like this guy was very religious. It's pretty well known he wasn't. They were pretty big on robbing Catholic ships, but that was mainly a thing where it was against the Spanish, so it wasn't necessarily all about Catholicism, I don't think, but they do say who had the most shit too.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they did by far.
Speaker 2:And a lot of it. What I've read was that basically they used it to demonize him in England and stuff like that because he was a convert. They used it to demonize him in England and stuff like that because he is a convert. You know, being a pirate, he's romanticized, but as soon as he was a convert to Islam, then it became a whole. He was a heathen at that point and looked at differently. But there was a lot of people. There was a lot of ballads written about this guy. I think it's one of the first pirates besides Francis Drake that people wrote ballads about, although I would say that John or Jack Ward here he takes the cake on being a pirate Because he bucked the queen too. You know, he totally was like fuck it, enemy of all mankind, guys. Right, what was the quote? Just to explain how people describe this guy. You'd found a thing where they're talking about what he looked like, him and his crew.
Speaker 1:Oh, I think when they showed up in Tunis and the Janissaries were dressed immaculately right, I mean, they were yes, and so they described this as not verbatim, but as them showing up bearded, toothless, like draped in velvet, basically like mismatched, just random things they had stolen from people, it just looked like a. I mean I'm sure they're kind of intimidating, but just a total different look than like the glamorous, you know, they looked like they were Out at sea.
Speaker 1:Well, yeah, yes where the janissaries looked like they might be waiting at a fine Ottoman restaurant or something, Only armed, but still. Yeah, it was just like who the fuck are these guys? I'm sure that's probably what some nice restaurants think when they show up to some extent.
Speaker 2:Yeah, probably so Probably so.
Speaker 1:No beard but lack of velvet get-ups, but a fair amount of jewelry sometimes.
Speaker 2:There you are. I found something. Jack Ward was described as a drunk from morn till night, the habits of a thorough salt, a fool and an idiot out of his trade, and also wearing curious and costly apparel. And he was also very short, with little hair, bald in front, swirly face and beard, speaks little and almost always swearing. That's something else Like.
Speaker 2:Whenever he talked, like I'm surprised there wasn't a bunch of fucking fuck, this and that and the other thing in that quote you read, because that was what he was known for. Like basically every other word that came out of this guy's mouth was cussing of sorts or something like you know whatnot, I guess. So he's kind of like what you think about when you think about the real dirtball pirate I feel, you know, as opposed to the elegant ambassador type pirates makes fun of him a lot of times because he wasn't really much of a pirate, but there were such things as these like pirates that came from lineages and such and were like lords or nobles of any class, you know, and so they did kind of carry themselves well. And then on the other end of the stick you had these guys that came out of places like Wapping and Kent and whatever, and they were just dirty freaking fishermen or dock workers, you know. And they decided to say fuck the system, it's rigged, and go after just ships, you know, and live a life.
Speaker 2:One of the sayings that comes out of Jack Ward's camp, somewhere, I feel, or if it's not, it's cool, it's a real pirate thing, but I'm not sure who said it. That's the only problem. But a short life and a merry one, that's a real pirate thing. I'm not sure who said it, that's the only problem. A short life and a merry one, that's the life for me. That's kind of how all these guys always lived. Pretty insane.
Speaker 1:What did he make it to? Didn't he make it to almost 70?
Speaker 2:Yeah, he was an old fart. He did actually make it quite a ways Later in life. He still lived in that alabaster mansion, although it was said to have been kind of run down over time, you know, and the ottoman empire wasn't once what it was, you know. It kind of kind of started its decline but they, uh they, they were talking about he. He loved incubating chicks, like that's what he did. He kind of lived for it. In his older years he would sit out on his, you know, overlook the ocean, kind of deal on like whatever porch I don't know what you want to call it in a freaking mansion you know a viewpoint of sorts, and he had a incubator full of eggs and that's what he did. He would just watch chicks hatch. That was his favorite thing, you know. It was also said that he was pretty hard to deal with in a lot of ways. If he weren't, he was smooth, but once you pissed him off he could be a pretty aggressive.
Speaker 1:fellow Pirates are not known for their understanding or coping skills.
Speaker 2:As far as I, know Right Well, and Matt Albers from the Pirate History Podcast, which we don't have any affiliation, just great show. He kind of describes it. Some of his, his tactics says like when he's talking with people as like somebody who is extremely drunk, uh, with severe ptsd and delusions of grandeur it sounds like a fun dinner guest.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because I because I mean, this guy was, he came from nothing, he was like 50, and all of a sudden he's like basically like an admiral of a pirate armada out of nowhere. You know, this happened within like three years, man. People are writing ballads about this guy, I don't know. Pretty strange character, if you ask me this Jack Ward.
Speaker 1:Not too many moved in. Did the neighbors like bring him a Bundt cake or something and he'd cut their heads off?
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's possible, I don't know, but I do love that. I love a lot of the descriptions of this guy, but he was just basically a short, fat, swarthy, sweaty, balding gentleman who basically didn't talk, he just cussed.
Speaker 1:I thought you snuck gentleman in there.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't know why, I didn't feel the need to, but I guess I had to. You know, it's a heck of a story. It's worth looking into. We kind of got sidetracked here and there, like we always do here at. I Tell Stories, and that's okay. I know it right. I live next to a grey house. They say, tracked here and there, like we always do here, I tell stories, and that's okay. What happened? I know it right. I live next to a gray house. They say nonetheless, um, wasn't too many dark turns on this episode. There's a lot more crazy shit around this guy. Uh, what was that? The famous ship he captured?
Speaker 1:I can never remember the name it was a venetian ship, right, that was supposed to be his biggest haul ever. Yeah, it was, and, as they, you know, it's on fire as the crew are trying to put that out and it's still just being pelted with cannon fire and the chain guns which Colt explained to me. It's a nasty, basically, like literally a chain, two small cannonballs chained together that just shred, shred, be it material, of human or ship. You're going to fuck some shit up, and so that's going on and he's just loading onto the boat to get all the silks and indigo or part of the main. And I don't know if I'm going to butcher this, actually I do know that. But as far as I know, the immense ship was called the Riniere e Soderina.
Speaker 2:No, that's it. You did it pretty good there.
Speaker 1:A Carrick, right yeah, is the type of ship.
Speaker 2:Say that again.
Speaker 1:That was like the.
Speaker 2:Carrick, yeah, carrick, yeah, bro, yeah, no, you nailed, it. Good job bro.
Speaker 1:Yep. So that was pretty much the biggest haul of his career, right, or at least a major score.
Speaker 2:No, that was the biggest haul of his career. There were some other ones that he was credited with, you know, because back then he was such a big name that even ships that he or his Janissary-like armada didn't capture that he still got credit for them because everybody wanted to blame Jack Ward. Basically, there was a very, very successful pirate out there who was kind of a gentleman pirate like we were just talking about in a way, and his name was Simon Dansker and he was credited for some pretty big hauls too, but Jack Ward got the credit for some of them. They did eventually work together briefly, so I don't know if that's how they got intertwined, but Jack Ward is definitely by far the most famous pirate of the era. This is pre-Golden Age of Piracy, so people aren't even out in Jamaica doing it all the way yet. It's still pretty much just Spain and Portugal out there, as far as I know. I mean, I know.
Speaker 1:Francis Drake, is there still wine? Obviously not rum yet.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I feel like it would be. You know they would water down their wine. I don't know, I'd have to look into that. When rum came into play, it definitely Because rum became. Sorry, rum became very popular and kind of came from when they tried to put all them sugar plantations over there in Jamaica and Cuba and all these places. And you know, the byproduct of it is molasses which, if I'm right, that's what you make rum from right. Pretty much is like that sounds correct. Yeah, yeah, so like it was. Just, you know, and that's why it became what it was. But you know, and they would, yeah, yeah, so they would have wine on ships, of course. I'm just not sure how they got by with their drinking water, because later on they would put, you know, rum in their water to keep it from spoiling, basically, or going stagnant or whatever you want to call it.
Speaker 2:But uh, yeah, pretty crazy stuff, this jack ward. Uh, I'm glad you got in his last ship there, because that is the big one, if you look him up and you're going to really do some research on him. His biggest deals was he was basically the admiral of a Muslim pirate fleet and he's from England, which is kind of a crazy story, and also the Cete de Solerina right. See, I can't say it right. That's why I had you say it, and I've heard Matt Albers say it a bunch recently. So what else? There you go.
Speaker 2:All right, shoot, I should have looked at my notes, I think. No, you nailed it because I've been listening to this stuff, trying to brush up on Jack Ward here real quick. But there is really a lot to this guy as far as pirates go. A lot of it's probably bullshit, except for the ships he captured and like the things that he did. Well, because pirates got, you know, fantasized in the Victorian era. So a lot of the history that we have on him is actually like not even firsthand to count, unless you're dealing with stuff by, like, william Dampier or something like that. You know, and that's a whole other story. Nonetheless, oh, thanks for doing a pirate episode that was pretty cool.
Speaker 1:Thank you, my friend. It's been fun. I liked reading on it and I'm glad you were so knowledgeable. Yeah, yeah, everybody, watch out for egg pirates out there.
Speaker 2:That's a thing? Yeah, that's a thing. You know that recently there's been more egg busts coming across the Mexican border than fentanyl First time ever, I guess, I don't know. Pretty weird. So everybody out there you know, maybe stay off the eggs, okay, you don't need to support this bullshit. Just joking, I don't know. I'm trying to think about fentanyl and eggs and how they correlate, I don't know. Anyway, stop by PitLockSupplycom if you want an I Tell Stories shirt. In the description under the show notes or you know, somewhere in there there's a support the show link. That'd be cool if you decide to do that. We are just independent out here floating on this ocean, all right, and I hope that everybody out there has a great day. And yeah, thanks for tuning in. Much love everybody. That everybody out there has a great day and yeah, thanks for tuning in. Much love everybody.
